Chapter 45

It was in Alex's handwriting.

 

Joyce Winters called 1535 re: environ. audit? Said to say it was 'purely professional'?

 

Damnit. I had been avoiding Joyce's calls all week - I had been worried that she was trying to call for another date or whatever it had been and frankly, that wasn't really something I was able to deal with right now. I supposed I should have been relieved to find that she was just interested in the audit we had discussed, but somehow the fact that she had kept calling and that Alex had spoken to her just made me more antsy.

On an impulse I picked up my phone and dialed Joyce's number, nearly hitting 'end' at the last second but somehow managing to hold on while it rang.

It was answered after only a couple of rings. "Winters speaking."

"Joyce, hi, hello. It's Kathryn, Kathryn Sinclair. From the university."

There was a slight chuckle on the other end of the line. "Ah, Kathryn," came Joyce's pleasant alto. "I take it you got my message?" It was clear what she meant.

"Yes, yes I did. Listen, I'm sorry I haven't spoken to you earlier, I just... things have been swamped here, we've had a special event on, and..." I was suddenly struck with guilt, and I rubbed a hand over my eyes, sighing. "And I was a bit afraid to talk to you. I'm sorry."

That chuckle again. "Well, now you know. No offense, Kathryn, you're gorgeous but I'm not the type to pursue a lost cause. I really do just want to look into making the firm more carbon neutral."

"Yes, I... realize that now. Like an idiot. And again, I'm sorry. Can I make it up to you?"

"You can let me buy you a business dinner."

"That would be great, actually."

 

"So," Joyce said as we passed our menus back to the waiter. "Let's talk sustainability."

I felt pretty stupid having avoided Joyce for all that time - upon seeing her again we slipped back into that easy, interesting conversation that had characterized most of our first meeting. She had come prepared, with figures and plans, and we spent most of the main course deep in discussion about recycling facilities, travel options and tax incentives.

"Well, it's great to finally meet and get all that hacked out," Joyce said as dessert arrived and we concluded our 'shop talk'. "I began to think those notes of mine were just going to rot in a drawer before you'd call me back."

"I know, I know, I'm sorry... it's been sort of a crazy week," I told her, shaking my head. "Things have gone a bit topsy-turvy since the last time we spoke."

Joyce raised her eyebrows, though in interest rather than surprise it seemed. "Want to talk about it?"

 

And so we did. I'll admit that it had been part of my motivation for agreeing to dinner; if there was anybody I could talk about these 'issues' with it was the woman who had opened my eyes to them in the first place.

"So this woman... is your assistant, right?" Joyce said, narrowing her eyes slightly. "The one I spoke to on the phone?"

"Alex. Yes. Which is a large part of the issue, I'm sure you'll agree."

"Mm, I suppose. Although office romances, discreetly conducted..."

"It's a bit more than that. I mean, I'm her boss - I don't think any amount of discretion is going to make that acceptable."

"So fire her," Joyce said with a smirk. "Well, don't fire her, but couldn't you... promote her sideways?"

"Yes, but..." I shook my head, spooning up a bite of sorbet. "Maybe if I had any idea what I was doing, but I don't. I didn't even think about this as an actual possibility until last week, for god's sake."

"See, that surprises me," Joyce said with a slight smile. "I mean, the idea that a self-possessed woman like yourself had never given much thought to her own... well, I guess sometimes life just works out that way."

"Even if I had thought about it, it's different when it's a person that I c-- work with. I couldn't just mess her about, and besides - she's the best assistant I've ever had!"

Joyce shot me a thoroughly skeptical smile now. "The best assistant you've ever had - I'll say."

"I just... don't want to lose her," I said, shaking my head. I should've known better than to hope Joyce might be able to suggest a solution to my problems - I was a pretty intelligent person and I couldn't figure a way out of it, so why should she be able to? "There just... isn't a good way out of this, is there?"

"Oh, I wouldn't say that. You never know what might happen," Joyce said, tipping her head to one side sympathetically. "But these things are pretty hard to fix without communication."

"Are you really supposed to be advocating that sort of thing? Don't you get more money if your clients don't talk it out?"

Joyce laughed at this. "Well, that's not really my field of law. Besides, I'm not your solicitor."

"No, just a very patient business associate. I'm sorry to have wasted so much of your time whinging. It's not very fair of me, especially after dodging your phone calls for so long."

"No, no, it's fine - you thought I wanted to jump your bones, I can't blame you for avoiding me."

I laughed. "I was beginning to wonder after the third day - that seemed like an awful lot of work to go to, even for a particularly good lay."

"Which in fairness could only be guesswork - for either of us," Joyce said with a wink.

"God, even moreso on my part."

"Hah, I'm sure you know better than to worry about something like that."

I smiled and shrugged, unsure if 'knowing better' really cancelled out not knowing at all, but Joyce didn't seem to think anything more need be said on that matter, returning my smile and moving on.

"Anyway, it sounds to me as though you've got some hard choices ahead of you either way. Are you sure this assistant thing isn't just your first 'crush', as it were? You could always look out some other pretty young women, get on the 'scene' - in a sophisticated Guardian personals sort of way I mean..."

"I've done my internet dating stint, thank you very much," I replied, shaking my head. "It may work beautifully for some people, but not for me."

"And you're sure you weren't just dipping your toe in the wrong pool?"

"I've always been more of an ocean-swimmer, really."

Joyce raised her eyebrows, her expression amused. "I have no idea where you just took that metaphor but it sounds dirty."

"...you're right, it does. Disregard anything that comes out of my mouth, clearly," I said, smirking.

"Hey, I'm not judging," Joyce said, holding up a hand. "You wanna swim in the ocean, bravo and good luck..."

"I think I might just stick with staying on dry land, for now. At least until I get my head sorted out. No sense plunging in before you know the conditions." Maybe I was overusing the metaphor, but it was helping me figure out a plan of action. Clearly whatever I did or didn't feel for Alex it would be silly to act on it, and possibly ruinous... better to maintain what we did have than push for something I wasn't sure either of us wanted.

"Well." Joyce spoke with a tone of finality, as though she'd decided that we'd achieved whatever it was she'd deemed we should from the conversation. I could imagine her closing on a jury. "Good luck with that, too."

 

[ 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 | 46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60 | 61 | 62 | 63 | 64 ]